Can your Relationship survive and how Counselling may help
Are you asking yourself the question, can my relationship survive?
If you are, then that must be followed up by the asking yourself, do I want it to survive?
The answer to that question ultimately depends on other sub-questions, why do I want it to survive?
Why would I not want it to survive?
What is happening now in the relationship for me to want or not want it to survive?
Are difficult times affecting my decision, one way or the other?
Understanding Difficult Times do Happen in Relationships
Firstly, what would you answer, if you were asked, do other people go through difficult times in their relationship?
Well, according to a study by the American Psychological Association, 90% of people in relationships reported experiencing difficult times at some point.
It is important to recognize the impact of these challenging periods on our relationships.
These difficult times can strain communication and trust within a relationship, leading to feelings of isolation and frustration. Understanding how these challenges affect your relationship is crucial in finding ways to overcome them together.
The Gottman institute discusses a worrying insight into relationships and with a trend where in its presence they can realistically predict with 93% certainty of the demise of a relationship.
This trend they call “The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.” The Four Horsemen are characterised as “Criticism”, “Contempt”, “Defensiveness” and “Stonewalling”.
Any one of these of can present themselves in a relationship at any one time, however this does not mean it is the end. It is the presence of all of 4 consistently that starts to push beyond “difficult times.”
Therefore, when faced with hardships, seeking counselling can provide valuable support and guidance for both partners.
Difficult times have the potential to either strengthen or weaken a relationship, depending on how they are navigated.
It is common for couples to feel overwhelmed and uncertain during these periods, but it is also an opportunity for growth and deeper connection.
Counselling can offer tools and strategies to help navigate through these challenges as a team. By acknowledging the impact of difficult times on your relationship, you can begin taking steps towards nurturing and strengthening your bond.
Strategies for Nurturing and Strengthening your Relationship during Challenges
We have established that you feel that your relationship is currently facing/going through difficult times.
As we have established that, we need to recognise that it is natural to feel overwhelmed during challenging periods, but it is important to remember that there are strategies for nurturing and strengthening your bond.
When faced with obstacles, initially you could simply try to improve your communication between you and your partner.
Taking the time to understand each other's perspectives and actively listening can create a sense of unity and support within the relationship.
Additionally, finding ways to show appreciation for one another and practicing patience can help maintain a strong connection even when things get tough.
That may sound easier said than done and if you are finding this difficult to achieve then seeking professional guidance such as counselling may be what you need.
For example, at Empowered Counselling Services in Wigan, we will work with you to help you to work out if you want to find your way back to each other and if you do, then ways to do this.
It is crucial to acknowledge that relationships require effort, they do not just happen as social media and/or others will lead you to believe, especially during trying times.
Seeking Support and Professional Help when Necessary
When facing difficult times in a relationship, it is important to remember that seeking support and professional help can be incredibly beneficial.
Whether it is through couples therapy, individual counselling, reading books or seeking advice from trusted friends and family members (who will give you impartial advice), reaching out for support can provide valuable insight and guidance.
It may be that you are one of the couples that does post a lot online, even though things are not as happy you present. Therefore, you may feel like you must navigate challenges on your own, but having the courage to seek outside help is a powerful step towards nurturing and strengthening your relationship.
It is okay to admit that you might need some extra assistance during tough moments.
Professional therapists and counsellors are trained to offer unbiased perspectives and tools for effective communication and problem-solving within relationships.
Remember that asking for help is not a sign of weakness, it is an act of strength and dedication to your relationship and showing the maturity that you understand that sometimes you need support.
In times of struggle, do not hesitate to explore the option of seeking professional help together as a couple. However, as a caveat to this, for it to be at it is most effective, you both need to want to try to and save the relationship and in turn be willing to do the work needed.
By doing so, you are demonstrating a willingness to invest in the well-being of your relationship. It takes courage to acknowledge when things are not going smoothly and take proactive steps toward finding solutions. However, it must be noted that not all relationships can be saved. This could be one or both knowing deep inside that they no longer want it, it could be to try to prove each that they tried to save it.
Embracing the idea of seeking support not only shows love for your partner but also fosters an environment where both individuals can grow and thrive together.
Conclusion
In conclusion, it is important to recognize that difficult times can have a significant impact on relationships. It is also important to realise that not all relationships can be saved. In which case, this is not always a bad thing either.
However, by implementing strategies such as open communication and mutual support, couples can navigate through challenges and emerge stronger than before.
According to a study by the American Psychological Association, 75% of couples report an improvement in their relationship after seeking professional help during tough times.
So, remember, with effort and dedication, your relationship can indeed survive and thrive despite adversity.